Confessions of a Reformed Workoholic

by Barbra

Wow. What a week. And here I thought “busy as a B*” is just a saying. I like being busy. Don’t know why. Probably I just like to keep busy in order to not be tempted to brood over the deeper meaning of life . . . or something equally important.

So, since I’ve had my share of being restricted to doing nothing but think last week (and the week before mostly) I’ve had my share of just coming home to sleep this week. I’ve had so much to do that I thought all those obligations and responsibilities would suffocate me.

I’ve had about 40 unread emails in one email-account - and I have two, which means I read through 80 unread emails and I replied to two thirds of them. Not only did I lose sight of some friendly chit-chat-mails, I also overlooked really important notices such as the one that asked me to pay for another 6 months of webspace. So now we don’t have a website for a day, the yummy background at the blog is temporarily gone and I’m afraid I lost the guestbook again. But I did a back-up in August! Now all that remains is finding out how that works. I’m a complete idiot when it comes to technical stuff - stuff I can’t see (and by watching finding out how it works).

But the silver lining is: I got my life back. And I love every second of it! I’ve been working only for the last three years. Either I was writing or working or doing household stuff or studying. There was no day off for me. I just did what I thought I had to do, because “if I don’t do it, nobody else will”. I was work, I lived and breathed work, I defined myself through my work and I believed the sole purpose of my existence is to work.

I totally forgot how important it is to have a life, to get out and meet friends and to just be - just be “me”. Sometime last week, in the throes of a fever, I realized I had to let go. There are things I just can’t change no matter how much I strive for control or struggle and fight and kick and scream against the inevitable. It’s still . . . well, INEVITABLE and all you can do is make the most of what remains - which is pretty much: You and your life.

Work can be fulfilling, but it’s not everything. You only have one life (well, depends on your religious belief actually) so make the most of it. Distinguish between what makes your life richer and what doesn’t. Enjoy the former, get rid of the latter and . . .
JUST B* ;-)