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"Chloe Harris" really is the pseudonym for two writers, Noelle and Barbra, who've joined forces to write intriguing and sexy stories. A quintessential eccentric southerner, Noelle seems to find a story in almost everything. Ever ambitious to change her stars, she has a degree in Communications. Barbra lives together with her cat ('Princess Mimi'), who isn't very happy that she is spending so much time on writing. But this folly of the living can opener with opposable thumbs is mostly tolerated.

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Thursday, May 28, 2009

Aftershocks of the UEFA Champions League

by Barbra

Yesterday’s soccer game started me thinking - again. I know, me thinking is usually not a good thing... but... well, let me show you the final goal of Barcelona vs. Manchester United:

To be honest, I favored ManU because they have yummy Ronaldo. But the way they played yesterday, they deserved what they got. I expected a real good game but instead I got this!

Don’t get me wrong. I only watch soccer when it’s the European or the World Championship. So you see, I’m definitely not a soccer fan. Never was, never will be. I openly admit it: I’m a soccer dummy.
I never really understood the appeal of soccer. There’s this rectangular turf field. Two goals in the middle of the short ends. And one ball. What now? If I’m not mistaken it was Archimedes who found the answer to it.
What? You don’t believe me?

Okay, I got that. So those twenty-two players are chasing one ball for forty-five minutes trying to maneuver aforementioned ball into the opposing goal. Then they take a break. After that they go on chasing that ball for another forty-five minutes - if they’re lucky. If it’s a draw, they have to go on running after that blasted ball for up to 30 minutes. In the end, the team that scores most, wins.

Oh-kay, to each their own, as I always say. Still don’t know why they’re chasing that ball, but okay. I accept it. I just have one more question: What if every player in the two teams got a ball to play around with?
That way all those muscular, sweaty men could play with their balls and maybe watching soccer would then be more fascinating for a girl like me...

What’s so fascinating about soccer? Can you tell me?
Or are you also one of those who doesn’t get it? If so, why?


Noelle said...

Yesterday was so disappointing. Hubby got off work early and I did everything I could to find a website I could listen to the game from that wasn’t blocked at work. And after all that hype and anticipation it ended up so one sided!! Hubby fell asleep while watching and I went back to listening to French Open coverage.

I was for Manchester for three reasons, one of my kids had a Manchester United football/Soccer birthday party for their 7th birthday in honor of the then number 7. I too am a CR fan, I’m a Rafa Nadal fan and he’s a Real Madrid fan so he pulls for any side but Barcelona.

Honestly I love sports all sport.
Yes Soccer is just 22 players trying to get a ball into a net but in truth it’s a metaphor for warring tribes planting their flag on the other’s parapet and showing their superiority.

Sport is a way in which men in our civilized society can prove their superior genetic make up now we are no longer cave people and wars just aren’t as good for that anyone with long range missiles and all. I’m a romantic and I love men and sports are a way to show modern men at their best.

Sports also provide exercise for both men and women where manual labor that keeps you fit isn’t the norm.

Soccer and other sports have become a vehicle for family bonding, social and even educational advancement. A way to teach our children what feudal systems, war and agrarian living may have taught before.

And duh it’s just fun!

Samantha Kane said...

Yeah, soccer just doesn't do it for me. I'll watch the occasional World Cup game, and I understand it, but it just doesn't engage me or thrill me. Now hockey? That's a gladiator sport. ;-)

That Monty Python skit was hilarious. I've never seen that one.

Anonymous said...

Soccer or hockey players as modern gladiators? Hm. Interesting. I've never seen it that way. Now that I can understand.

But in my family it has never been a vehicle for family bonding. If anything mom and I always rolled our eyes and played rummy while dad was watching soccer in the other room.

Oh, I love Monty Python!!! Rarely a skit I haven't seen!